COLOUR OF SORROW

COLOUR OF SORROW

What colour do we see when we feel happy? What colour do we see when we are angry? List of such questions may be never ending but at this hour I am wondering what colour do we see when we are deep soaked in sorrow.It was fourteenth Feb , the day popularly known as the valentine’s day, some colour was more prevalent than others that day though I read in newspaper much later. I got up in the morning and found my pillow wet, it reminded me of what I was going through and made me cry again, not the kind of start one would want for himself. But I had an unfinished job , I walked out of the house to see my wife and break the most unwanted news to her. All my way I was thinking about the way I would tell her, I was unsure of the words I would use but then I realized that words would be insignificant just a look at my face and colour of eyes would tell her the entire story.On my way I saw people holding roses in their hand and wearing some particular colour, I couldn’t make out what colour that was. I wanted to rush up to her there was a haste in my walk, though I did have a sad news but I wanted to tell her as early as possible I didn’t even consider her being unwell, perhaps crying my heart out with her was only concern. I entered her room, she asked me without using any words and all I could hardly whisper in her ears and we broke into tears, for a moment crying felt good. I wished I could cry more but the unfinished job was on my mind so I left her in tears and moved onto my destination.Walking towards the mortuary I was thinking about those black mortuary vans and I was wondering if mortuary was black in colour but I think it was not. Soon my frozen baby was handed over to me and I again travelled and incidentally in a black car. I was holding her in my arms , the ice was melting and so was my grief and was coming out through my eyes. I felt the baby was so relaxed in my arms. Travelling along a canal we crossed few fields and reached the banks of Yamuna. A man started digging with shovel and finished soon as the sand was loose, I wished if he could dig deeper to accommodate my grief but I was told it was deep enough, I got ready to lower the baby keeping the sorrow to myself. I removed the white cloth saw a red colour blood clot on her left cheek, she still looked so cute I wanted to kiss her cheeks.As I lowered her down my eyes were filled with water I couldn’t see anything clear, sunlight broke into many colours through the water in my eyes but looked colourless. I was wondering what is the colour of sorrow, that day I saw every colour but none meant anything to me.